Lucky for Alice that the U.S. Post Office didn’t set up shop in Wonderland, because this is exactly how my latest visit went down, no lie, no exaggeration.

 I went to take care of my passport renewal first thing in the morning on a weekday and found a long snake of a line filled with grim, simmering citizens. There were three post office workers manning the battle stations. One was wearing a surgical mask and, oddly, winter gloves, and spent 25 minutes (damn right I clocked her) berating an elderly man for not understanding the eight or so options she spat out for sending his box.

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